Has anyone's parents gotten divorced later in life

Sang Froid wrote: SamoneLenior wrote:   you have no heart or trollin Nah I'm just not into pity parties. And I just don't understand why people would think of their parents as some infallible beings. They are human and have *&%^$#@Eed up relationships like everybody else.

they get that part but they are still sad to see them get divorced

goodm3 wrote: Limalady wrote: Some people put a lot of their self-worth and value in coming from a 2 parent home. If one took pride in having the typical, nuclear family, I can see why divorce (even later in life), would be a difficult adjustment. If someone viewed their parents as the epitome of love or marriage, the demise of that relationship may be difficult to accept. This is just my hypothesis. I have never experienced this. this. to me, if you're parents are married, your initial views on love and marriage is based on your parents' relationship. why would i look to Barack and Michele when I have my own parents.

This - to both posts.

Sure your parents relationship isn't your relationship, but it's still something that you're exposed to. Even though my parents didn't get officially divorced until I was way older, seeing them apart and the tension between them definitely shaped how I wanted a relationship to be and the kind of man I wanted (or didn't want).

So to say "what's the big deal/get over it" is a little ridiculous in my opinion. From a psych perspective, your parents are the key aspects for shaping your moral compass, how you view the world, etc. And especially later in life, to see your parents divorce may make some people wonder if the whole thing (their parents marriage) was a charade - even if they know that it's better for their parents to be apart.

Anyone who's been in an LTR or has relatives/ long time friends who've been in an LTR/married and later broke up will tell you, when it happens to someone close to you (or yourself), you're going to get shaken a bit.

I think the kids feel torn after the divorce. One time when my nephew was riding  home with me from college (he was at duke-yuck, I was at carolina-yay) , and I asked him    where do you want me to drop you off? . He got all stressed and flustered.  He started going into panic mode about 50 miles out. If he goes to mom's first dad will be mad, if he goes to dad's house first mom will say why didn't you come here first? Never occurred to me that such a simple question could cause so much angst. 

Edited by PurpleHaze - Nov 27 2012 at 5:10pm

I didn't think people who were grown took their parents divorce so seriously...its really not that big of a deal. *this is going to sound heartless but whatever* You want them to be happy and sometimes that means for them to be apart, I find that grown children crying over their parents divorce kinda selfish. Its not about you, like others have mentioned, they probably stayed in a relationship they couldn't stand because of you. Let them divorce and be happy. I was happy as hell when my parents split, I was in the single digits but I could feel that tension in the household and it wasn't good for me, my bro or my mom...sometimes cords have to be cut. I couldn't imagine living in a home where two people hate one another, I'd rather have you be apart and happy, than together and miserable just because you want to give me a two parent home. I'd take two loving happy single parent homes over that sh*t any day. 

Sang may be trolin' sometimes, but one thing she said on BHM before that stood out to me was

Edited by Organic - Nov 28 2012 at 2:58am