| nitabug wrote:|
I get it. I rarely saw aa's embrace other black immigrants unless they were light and exotic. I get why they don't always run to the arms of aa's
I understand what you're saying. My experience has been the different and I have interacted closely with several black immigrant families. Thinking about the conversation we've been having on BHM about language and specifically AAVA I'm realizing that understanding and speaking our language is huge. I'm specifically talking about understanding the way we speak, not necessarily being completely fluent in Ebonics. The other thing I recall is that their mothers and our mothers were friends. So their mother was another accepted person in my mother's circle of friends and the only thing that seemed different about them was my little ears could hear that their mom "talked funny" but they were using words in the same way my mother did. They knew how to speak in our "secret way" that made them seem no different from my mom.
I'm rambling a little but I'm trying to say I suspect her mother didn't have a lot of actual AA women in her social circle so she didn't really meet many AAs while she was growing up. That matters a lot because I think we can tell when someone isn't familiar with "us".
I am guilty of placing a few people outside of that dynamic as "a white girl with black skin". Even some from the suburbs who only ever had yt people in their circle of community. I have tried to relate but found that we had zero in common and the trust just never happened. When we reach a certain age it is either there or it isn't. Maybe this creates an insurmountable barrier but I believe that is our culture and I'm not really mad at it. BHM is a good example. Diane was saying how she learned what we called Ebonics by being a part of this community. Coming to the US now she would easily blend in and be able to communicate with AAs fluently and she would just be like any other friend. Without that both she and we might be confused trying to get to know each other as adults. That would be sad because Diane seems very funny and very sweet.
I hope I'm making sense but I guess I'm trying to say is how "community" influences this dynamic. Maybe just one of many parts but I think it may be a big part of it.