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Feeling Comfortable in MY skin

 
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FlattytoFatty View Drop Down
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    Posted: May 25 2013 at 12:53am
I am constantly bombarded with images of the "ideal" female. Now here I am : a transitioning (hair-wise) Caribbean American young woman who is on the thicker side. How does one feel comfortable in their skin? I don't like a lot of things about myself and how no idea where or how to start. Can anyone out there give advice? or has the same issue?
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Printer_Ink View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Printer_Ink Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 25 2013 at 5:10am
I watch a lot of tv etc as well - but I don't feel bombarded with images of what I should look like.
 
If this bothering you I really think it comes from upbringing .. your family etc saying or doing things such by the time you step out into the world ... you are so damaged and weakened internally that images on tv or whatever make you feel bad about yourself. Family is supposed to help build you up on  the inside so that by the time you leave home you are 'prepared' to face the hard, cruel world.
 
I think you need to read some self esteem books or surf the web or go for counseling because self-esteem is a big topic that can't be cover by picking up tips on a site like this. Shocked
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FlattytoFatty View Drop Down
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My family supports me in everything that I do. i doubt i need counseling lol. it's just sometimes i don't feel comfortable with certain things I like to do. I guess it stems from being shy and learning to accept myself and who i am.
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Limalady View Drop Down
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Highlight your positive attributes. Dress up, go out, and do things that make you feel good.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Printer_Ink Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 28 2013 at 3:35pm
Originally posted by FlattytoFatty FlattytoFatty wrote:

My family supports me in everything that I do. i doubt i need counseling lol. it's just sometimes i don't feel comfortable with certain things I like to do. I guess it stems from being shy and learning to accept myself and who i am.
 
Umm this is what you said:
 
*********************
I am constantly bombarded with images of the "ideal" female. Now here I am : a transitioning (hair-wise) Caribbean American young woman who is on the thicker side. How does one feel comfortable in their skin? I don't like a lot of things about myself and how no idea where or how to start. Can anyone out there give advice? or has the same issue
 
**********************
 
But now you are saying... 
**********************
it's just sometimes i don't feel comfortable with certain things I like to do.
******************
 
Which one is it? It sounds like you are backtracking now that I have expressed my opinion.
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FlattytoFatty View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote FlattytoFatty Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 28 2013 at 11:35pm
when i said i don't like a lot about myself i didn't mean mainly physically . i reread what i typed and noticed how it could be misinterpreted so i corrected myself and made what i meant more clear .
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Omgitsdannie101 View Drop Down
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I'm trying to figure this out myself
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sugabanana View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote sugabanana Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 29 2013 at 9:28pm
Originally posted by Printer_Ink Printer_Ink wrote:

Originally posted by FlattytoFatty FlattytoFatty wrote:

My family supports me in everything that I do. i doubt i need counseling lol. it's just sometimes i don't feel comfortable with certain things I like to do. I guess it stems from being shy and learning to accept myself and who i am.
 
Umm this is what you said:
 
*********************
I am constantly bombarded with images of the "ideal" female. Now here I am : a transitioning (hair-wise) Caribbean American young woman who is on the thicker side. How does one feel comfortable in their skin? I don't like a lot of things about myself and how no idea where or how to start. Can anyone out there give advice? or has the same issue
 
**********************
 
But now you are saying... 
**********************
it's just sometimes i don't feel comfortable with certain things I like to do.
******************
 
Which one is it? It sounds like you are backtracking now that I have expressed my opinion.


Whoa Becky give her some space and let her express herself. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. You know I love you like a sister but dang. You seem a little harsh in your response.
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FlattytoFatty View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote FlattytoFatty Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 29 2013 at 10:53pm
@omgitsdannie i think limalady made a good point when she said go out and do things you like. I guess as you make yourself happy you learn to embrace who you are then people around you accept you and you feel comfortable . I think it's a cycle . noww I may not be correct but that's what i think and i'm gunna give it a shot . . . what the worse that could happen :)

and thanks @sugabanana . sometimes people interpret things inncorectly from how someone means it :/ .


Edited by FlattytoFatty - May 29 2013 at 10:56pm
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LadyAradia View Drop Down
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The NOBODIES with a lot of money (like Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian) become HOT by hiring publicists, makeup artists, stylists, personal trainers, wardrobe consultants and plastic surgeons. You have to do all of the above yourself. You have to put the right spin on yourself to sell yourself and you've got to develop an artistic eye to critically see yourself like others do and literally REMAKE every aspect of yourself to sell yourself to the point that you become your version of the ideal woman. The alternative is to sell yourself as  "real" down to earth and a total rebel against societal standards of aesthetics. Sell yourself instead to those who are looking for alternative beauty.   
But which ever path you choose, youve got to see it, create it on all levels, become it, and SELL it. So you have to recreate yourself, rebirth yourself and OWN it. This requires a lot of work on your part but everything worthwhile requires a lot of effort.

My real point though is if you are working THAT HARD, you should have little time to feel insecure. Also if you develop passion and conviction about it, you cant feel as insecure if you are filled almost with anger or intense passion about what you're doing.


Edited by LadyAradia - May 30 2013 at 9:37am
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