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father beats 13yo daughter for running away.

 
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PurplePhase View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote PurplePhase Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 15 2014 at 5:32pm
didn't watch*, but based on responses and previous videos I'm sure it's abuse to me.

I also hate videos like this. But if it gets him arrested and the girl some help... it worked.

*not showing 


Edited by PurplePhase - Mar 15 2014 at 5:33pm
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PurplePhase View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote PurplePhase Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 15 2014 at 5:35pm
 
Originally posted by Gkisses Gkisses wrote:

This type of behavior doesnt occur over night.Rarely is it without reason. Elsewhere her parent(s) dropped the ball. Im sorry if your 13yo is running away and exhibiting hoe tendencies you failed as a parent. Accept your role in the matter and improve.
 

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote OhMyCurlz Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 15 2014 at 5:36pm
Originally posted by Lady ICE Lady ICE wrote:

had i been dressed like that..and ran away...theres no doubt my mom wouldve done this to me. or worst...being heavy handed and all that. 

....she still would actually.Cry


anyways that looked really rough. why did he do it outside? i can understand being angry..but that was going overboard?ConfusedConfusedi dont know what to say really.
She probably just came back to the house and was outside since she still had her clothes and shoes on. 

They were wrong in the way they handled it, but she wasn't right either. 
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femmefatale85 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (6) Thanks(6)   Quote femmefatale85 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 15 2014 at 5:39pm
yea because i would want to live in a place where the people that supposedly love me call me a b*ch & a ho -_-

i hope he gets arrested

i knew a lot of girls that ran away and they were fleeing abusive homes

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (4) Thanks(4)   Quote newdiva1 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 15 2014 at 5:44pm
this is not a spanking.  this was a beating.  smh.  the girl is 13...her acting out comes from whatever is going on at home bet.  I remember hormones. They were a b*tch and had me thinking crazy thoughts but I did not act out in any type of destructive manner.  Hormones ain't spark this girl into all of a sudden dressing way too grown and dissapearing doing who knows what for days.  This is normal behavior at her house.  She was taking that beating like she had been beat many times before.  She wasn't even crying out really.
 
 
I really should read a thread sometimes. what Gkisses said.


Edited by newdiva1 - Mar 15 2014 at 5:46pm
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote afrokock Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 15 2014 at 5:54pm
Originally posted by PurplePhase PurplePhase wrote:

didn't watch*, but based on responses and previous videos I'm sure it's abuse to me.

I also hate videos like this. But if it gets him arrested and the girl some help... it worked.

*not showing 
me too

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote Gkisses Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 15 2014 at 6:01pm
Omc@...


Youre missing my point. I come from a home where whippings took place. There were never the first or only form of discipline. By the age of 13 there were no longer necessary. It wasnt because I had the fear of god put in me nor did i fear my parents per say. What I did fear was disappointing them. As much as my parents demanded respect of me they also respected me as their child.


Giving any child any form of discipline without addressing the cause is a waste of time. Teens are most likely to show out in this manner because there is a poor family structure in place, mental illness or some kind of tamatic event. In all these cases it is the parents job to seek help. If a parent feels the only way to get repect from their child is via a belt then they have failed.


Obviously beating her isnt helping. And nothing about that video says she comes from a stable home. Discipline is about balance.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote Az~Maverick Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 15 2014 at 6:16pm
Calling her all kinds of bytches, h0es & public humiliation would make the behavior worse I think, and this is coming from someone who believes in spankings....not beatings.

That was waaaay overboard. She'll wind up leaving the house permanently on her own before she gets 18....and who can blame her? Smh
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote OhMyCurlz Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 15 2014 at 6:35pm
That's for you though. What worked for you may not work for her. I understand what you mean, I'm not condoning this man's actions or even really disagreeing with you. I was raised the same way and I agree the home is unstable.

You can fear disappointing your parents while also fear punishment. I'm sure it was a good mix of both. I think for most kids it's a mix of both.

How do you know they have not addressed this with her?  This was a 19 second clip.We only know what happened at the time that the bystander started filming this. People keep saying "talk about it, talk about it". Okay...then what? What if they already talked about it? 

In all these cases it is the parents job to seek help.

Exactly. Now what would you suggest? What is "help"? The police do not help. CPS does not help. You cannot "force" a child to do certain things, legally. If the girl contracted an STD her parents could not even make her take a test or get treatment. If she committed a crime she would simply be arrested. Counseling does not always prevent this type of behavior and you can't "force" medication down a persons' throat. It's not as easy as people think. People say "seek help", but what does that mean? What are the alternatives? What I'm saying is those avenues are not as abundant as people who have not gone through this type of situation may think. Police recommend...nothing. They simply bring the child home and keep on pushing. 

There should be more programs to help troubled youth and programs for parents to learn how to properly handle and discipline their children to prevent this type of behavior. There should be clearly laid out repercussions for children who leave the home if abuse is proven to not be present. THEN situations like this will no longer happen. Give someone the tools to do something different and they may.....do something different. At the very least there wont be an excuse. 

One could argue that if you have to ever get to the point where you have to whip a child then you have "failed" as a parent. There are a lot of people who believe hitting a child (even up to the age of 13) is a form of failure on the parents part. That's all subjective. 

This man was wrong. The whipping was not wrong. The way he did it was wrong. She was wrong too.


Edited by OhMyCurlz - Mar 15 2014 at 6:45pm
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (7) Thanks(7)   Quote ms_wonderland Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 15 2014 at 6:43pm
Curlz, it seems like the experience with your sister is making you not look at the situation objectively.  You still don't know this girls story and she's automatically the guilty one for you.  So many black girls feel undervalued because they truly are...can ppl ever give a black girl the benefit of the doubt as the victim?  She's just doing what jezebels do?  

Edited by ms_wonderland - Mar 15 2014 at 6:45pm
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