My cat is a jerk too. Once i pull up to the drive way my cat dips like he's never seen me before and shots were fired, im like " B*tch you were sleeping next to me all night

". And i know he hears me calling him cause everytime a call his name his ear twitches in my direction,but he never turns around

. And i could be gone for a week and come back i either get sleepy/bored eyes or he flees.
my dog on the other hand is annoying. I could go out to check the mail, literally like two minutes, he's already by the window staring out sadly. Once i come back he acts like ive been gone forever. Come back from work he's all over the place, he'll run and bring me a sock or slipper then not let me have it, start sprinting around the house. all while my cat looks on with extreme unfathomable disinterest ....