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Being bullied by my parents about my weight

 
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megchick96 View Drop Down
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    Posted: Jun 06 2013 at 6:57am
Hi,
I'm a 16 year old female, 5'9.5 and I weigh 54kg. My mother is always making mean comments about how skinny I am. She likes to look at me in disgust and tell me that I'm too grossly skinny, even though she knows I eat a lot. She has previously said that my weight makes her feel sick. She is very curvaceous and 'thick'.  I think she feels ashamed that her only daughter has a very skinny body. My father doesn't usually personally attack me but he really loves curvy women. He is always praising the body type and saying 'every black girl should have a big butt'. He says he feels bad for black girls with no butt (i.e me).
 
At school I was also getting badly bullied for being thin. I started to spend all my allowance on fattening foods. I would force myself to eat lard and spread it on everything. I would force myself to have mayonnaise spread even though I hated the taste. When nothing worked I started to lose it. I didn't have many friends so went on the internet a lot only to read more mean comments about my size. I was a Straight-A student but my grades started to fall significantly. I ended up in a psychiatric ward after a suicide attempt.
 
After my attempt my parents couldn't even look at me anymore. They tried to help, but the damage was already done. My mother still continues to attack me about my skinniess.
 
I'm slightly better than I was before, but I still cry everyday. I just need some advice. Please, please - no mean comments.
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Omgitsdannie101 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Omgitsdannie101 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 06 2013 at 9:05am
I'm so sorry that ou're goon through this. Have you ever considered talking to a professional counselor?
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missashleybxo View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote missashleybxo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 06 2013 at 9:26am
Hey meg!! From one skinny black girl to another I get where you're coming from! I'm 20, 5'4 and I weigh 50 kg! When I was younger, I got teased a little bit but mostly from family members I never got bullied at school. So I don't understand everything that you're going through but no matter what I don't think suicide attempts is the answer for you! It will only make you feel worst and more ostracized by your familyCry In my opinion even if you did gain all the weight you wanted, you still need to work on your confidence! You have to find yourself beautiful & have confidence in yourself before others can see how beautiful you are! I would love to be 5'9.5!! I hate being so short but I know I probably won't gain 5 inches and I accept it (reluctantly) LOL. As for advice on how to gain weight, there is a body types thread on here check it out! There are so many successful stories in there. You can achieve the weight you want in such a healthier way! Please please don't force yourself to eat pig fat again :) By the way, your measurements are the measurements of Victoria Secret's Angels!!! Tyra Banks was often made fun of how skinny she was when she was younger and look at her nowSmile There are so many people out there that would killlll to be your size! Even though you don't know it there are probably strangers who see you on the street and wish they would be as tall as you or as skinny as you!! I'd probably be one of those girls envying your height!! LOL Remind yourself how lucky and beautiful you are love!!!! <3 PM me if you want to talk about anything else girl :) HugHeart
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prittyhurr View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote prittyhurr Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 06 2013 at 11:09am
I had the opposite problem. To society, I was too fat. I lost a sh!t load of weight and people are still b!tch!ng about my body (i.e. my butt is too flat or my breasts too small). Fcuk em! What your parents are doing is inexcusable. Just because they are your parents doesn't excuse it. When you drag children here, you cause them to need to be cared for.

If I were you, I would talk to a counselor. I would also sever ties with the toxic parents when I came of age.

You cannot please people. People are stupid. I have very few people I associate with since I have been burned too many times. Posts like yours reminds me that I have made the right decision.

If there's anything that I can do for you, then please ask!

:)
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sexyandfamous View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote sexyandfamous Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 06 2013 at 1:21pm
Tell your mom that her comments are not helping and are hurtful.
If she doesn't change after that, just ignore her and start counting the days until you are an adult in college. Get your grades back up because none of those people (the bullies) will matter or help you ten years from now.
People don't see beauty everywhere, that's why they are stupid to make those comments. I have always been the same weight as you (or less!) and still got attention from men.

The ones not giving you attention are not worth it, trust me on that: I liked many boys back when I was a teenager whom didn't like me back because I was skinny, and when I look them up on facebook (just for fun) I see that not one of them is doing good in life. You can't expect much from someone who puts emphasis only on body types instead of focus on personality, intelligence and kindness.

Move on, girl. Ignore those bullies. Like I said, they don't matter.


Edited by sexyandfamous - Jun 06 2013 at 1:22pm
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csungrl09 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote csungrl09 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 06 2013 at 7:08pm
totally understand where you are coming from! My mom and dad do the same thing (not to that extent though). I wasn't ever bullied at school for being too skinny but my self confidence suffers sometimes because I am so small. I think if you can find clothing that fits your body shape/weight/type you can build your confidence back up. Ignore your parents. if your parents are anything like mine, your mom is probably secretly jealous and your dad is a fool. Just keep your head up OP.
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Prazol60 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Prazol60 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 07 2013 at 1:19am
Do not try to make yourself 'thicker'. In the long run you will suffer major health issues. It sucks but you might just have to put up with it until you can get out on your own.

As you get older and outside your current circle you will meet people who won't make fun of you. And not care how thick or skinny you are. Also take a look around, how these people thick or plain ol fat?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote morenaloca Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 07 2013 at 3:23am
There is nothing wrong with being thin. You know lots of women go to extremes to have your body! Starving, intense diets, liposuction. I think you should put more effort into becoming more comfortable in your own skin instead of being concerned with other's opinions. I know they are your parents but they aren't perfect. Noone is. Keep your spirits up!
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reneex View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote reneex Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 07 2013 at 6:48am
life isn't about how big your boobs or behind are.

i had the same problem then i realised that my mission in life is not to seek the approval of narrow minded people but to help others in life & for some reason when i realised that all my insecurities went away

no matter what you do everyone isn't going to approve of you so why bother?

ignore your parents just focus on paying attention to what matters in life instead of all this shallow petty stuff

people are getting beaten murdered starving and all ppl care about is if your ass is big or not? silly
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Printer_Ink Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Jun 07 2013 at 8:55am
Wow, it never ceases to amaze me .. how cruel people can treat their own children.
 
To the OP - keep your head up. Get your grades and get off to college and then ... into the world.
 
Get away from that negative family first chance you get and .. don't look back.
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