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uppitynegroid
Platinum Member
Joined: Jul 28 2005
Status: Offline
Points: 48719
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Posted: Nov 17 2012 at 1:02pm |
nitabug wrote:
after 10+ years, sh*t, you should have a better algorithm than pandora by then.
I get it, but I don't buy it. It's still sad. Certain goals unaccomplished are just sad to me after a decade has past.
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I've been dating since 19 (8 years) and i would be lying if I said I have never dated someone who was marriage material. I would say in those 8 years there is definitely 1 boyfriend that I could have had a healthy, normal marriage with. I wasn't in love with him and had no physical attraction to him whatsoever. I'll tell you in a few years if I regret my decision...
Anyway, its human to make mistakes and mess up relationships. I know maybe two people who married their 1st or 2nd boyfriend. Most people date several men, make mistakes, waste time in ending relationships that obviously won't work, get their heart broken, etc. I don't think that makes you a failure unless you never learn your lesson from it.
There are a ton of factors (some being out of your control) that can lead you to be over 30 an unmarried. I don't know if I would make a character assessment based on the age a woman marries. People who marry in their twenties don't necessarily have it all figured out either, since that is the median marrying age and based on statistics about half of them don't stay married.
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nimkola
VIP Member
Joined: Mar 20 2010
Status: Offline
Points: 8541
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Posted: Nov 17 2012 at 1:05pm |
Hmm, not sure. I don't think I want kids (doubtful I can have them anyway) and I've never really been fussed with relationships. Eh...maybe I'll panic at 35.
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Bunnyahh
Guest Group
Joined: Aug 14 2009
Location: ♥ Cloud 9 ♥
Status: Offline
Points: 162121
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Posted: Nov 17 2012 at 1:08pm |
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Sang Froid
Elite Member
Joined: Aug 08 2010
Location: Ethiopia
Status: Offline
Points: 329070
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Posted: Nov 17 2012 at 1:09pm |
Positive K wrote:
I won't say every woman that makes it to 30 without marriage is sad or unrealistic...but a lot of women are trying to wait for something that doesn't exist...they won't ever get married until they figure out what is it inside of them that is stopping them from meeting and connecting with a decent dude
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Black men end up staying with a nigguh that ain't never gone marry their asses. We see this more often.
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Flowing-Ice
Elite Member
Joined: Feb 27 2010
Location: Fanm Sa Move
Status: Offline
Points: 98207
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Posted: Nov 17 2012 at 1:11pm |
Positive K wrote:
I won't say every woman that makes it to 30 without marriage is sad or unrealistic...but a lot of women are trying to wait for something that doesn't exist...they won't ever get married until they figure out what is it inside of them that is stopping them from meeting and connecting with a decent dude
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i don't think thats true. a lot of women have very realistic standards.
they just ... have bad decision making and judgement.
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nitabug
Elite Member
Joined: Sep 25 2008
Status: Offline
Points: 339358
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Posted: Nov 17 2012 at 1:13pm |
Let me be clear. I am not talking about ALL women. I am talking about a population of women. those that want to be married early, early twenties or so....will panic around 27-29 and are like 30+...lets just say 35ish AND STILL UNWED. It's sad that you thought about wedding bells since childhood/teens, became an adult and it never happened. You've been wanting it to happen but it just. never. did. Sad...AF. Just like someone who is fat, and dieting for 10 plus years and never has lost weight. Just like someone who has bad credit/finances and after 10+ years is still broke after trying...for all that time. Someone is going about reaching their destination in the wrong way. It's like watching a dementia patient trying to find his/her way home.
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Bunnyahh
Guest Group
Joined: Aug 14 2009
Location: ♥ Cloud 9 ♥
Status: Offline
Points: 162121
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Posted: Nov 17 2012 at 1:14pm |
Flowing-Ice wrote:
Positive K wrote:
I won't say every woman that makes it to 30 without marriage is sad or unrealistic...but a lot of women are trying to wait for something that doesn't exist...they won't ever get married until they figure out what is it inside of them that is stopping them from meeting and connecting with a decent dude |
i don't think thats true.
a lot of women have very realistic standards.
they just ... have bad decision making and judgement. |
the stats prove otherwise
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nitabug
Elite Member
Joined: Sep 25 2008
Status: Offline
Points: 339358
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Posted: Nov 17 2012 at 1:15pm |
And I know there are many other factors...because there are millions of ways/combinations to fail.
& no...the person who just married anybody isnt better, just like the person who starved themselves isn't any better, nor is the person who robbed the poor...
but that is a different conversation, and just puts the light else where...which might be the reason why it's taking some people 10+ years
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Bunnyahh
Guest Group
Joined: Aug 14 2009
Location: ♥ Cloud 9 ♥
Status: Offline
Points: 162121
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Posted: Nov 17 2012 at 1:17pm |
Sang Froid wrote:
Positive K wrote:
I won't say every woman that makes it to 30 without marriage is sad or unrealistic...but a lot of women are trying to wait for something that doesn't exist...they won't ever get married until they figure out what is it inside of them that is stopping them from meeting and connecting with a decent dude |
Black men end up staying with a nigguh that ain't never gone marry their asses.
We see this more often. |
blk women & yes I see it all the time. on bhm & irl. Ruining the natural order & stunting the growth of progress
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uppitynegroid
Platinum Member
Joined: Jul 28 2005
Status: Offline
Points: 48719
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Posted: Nov 17 2012 at 1:18pm |
nitabug wrote:
Let me be clear. I am not talking about ALL women. I am talking about a population of women. those that want to be married early, early twenties or so....will panic around 27-29 and are like 30+...lets just say 35ish AND STILL UNWED.
It's sad that you thought about wedding bells since childhood/teens, became an adult and it never happened. You've been wanting it to happen but it just. never. did. Sad...AF.
Just like someone who is fat, and dieting for 10 plus years and never has lost weight.
Just like someone who has bad credit/finances and after 10+ years is still broke after trying...for all that time.
Someone is going about reaching their destination in the wrong way. It's like watching a dementia patient trying to find his/her way home. 
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