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Am I wrong?

 
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Tbaby View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (4) Thanks(4)   Quote Tbaby Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 19 2014 at 11:10am
Sorry Twisted but Midna, Printer Ink, and Natural Sister all gave you really good advice regardless of the delivery method.  I read your OP and I thought the same thing--"Twisted is on repeat cycle with these bfs and babies".

1 dysfunctional person + 1 dysfunctional person = dysfunctional relationship that's doomed (high probability)

Get counseling please.  You have got to stop making illogical decisions (wanting to be pregnant and engaged isn't romantic or smart) because 2 small lives are depending on you.  Yall been dating only 6 months yet you feel you haven't been rushing things.  Sorry but 6 months isn't any time to know someone.  Marriage and children are serious life choices and shouldn't be done simply because they are "romantic".  You are now tied permanently not one but 2 men--one who's a dead beat and the current one you have real doubts about.

Forget about his mother--that shouldn't be your focus.  Your focus is that your SO doesn't have a good relationship w/ his mother and treats her disrespectfully. You stating in your OP--based on your experiences abusive men are terrible to their mothers.  Listen to that voice already screaming in your mind.  Stop ignoring it

He suggested to raise the kids in separate householdsConfused.  Stop ignoring the flashing neon signs. 
He wants to put off marriage til he can buy you a 10K ring initially *flash, flash*
Do you really want to risk marrying a guy who really doesn't want to be married on top of everything else?

I'm not going to pick out any more examples (there's so many more) but you get the picture.  Connect the dots.   Do better please for your sake and the sake of your kids.



Edited by Tbaby - Mar 19 2014 at 11:30am
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Tbaby View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (4) Thanks(4)   Quote Tbaby Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 19 2014 at 11:15am
Originally posted by Twisted_Angel Twisted_Angel wrote:



Too many black women making dumb decisions while the man just can walk away.



Take your own words seriously.
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Twisted_Angel View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Twisted_Angel Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 6:40pm
Like I said...y'all took it wayy too far and misunderstood my point. Im still alive and kicking with a ring on my finger

Y'all a trip...

But I appreciate the concern. But u got it all wrong.

TC.

Edited by Twisted_Angel - Apr 17 2014 at 6:41pm
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote Journey94 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 7:42pm
This is sad, black women still haven't learned
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote Midna Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 7:47pm
Originally posted by Twisted_Angel Twisted_Angel wrote:

Like I said...y'all took it wayy too far and misunderstood my point. Im still alive and kicking with a ring on my finger

Y'all a trip...

But I appreciate the concern. But u got it all wrong.

TC.


You made this thread a month ago.


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (6) Thanks(6)   Quote Printer_Ink Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 10:34pm
Geesh woman ... having a 'ring on your finger' doesn't MEAN anything in and of itself. It is just the outward symbol of love, commitment, trust, security etc .. pretty much everything you are NOT getting from this relationship. Otherwuse ... it's just for 'show'. DUH!

Gosh how many (miserable married) women do I know that couldn't wait to brag about getting ring on their finger because they thought that made them 'somebody'.

You've gotta aim higher girlfriend.

Being happy - whether in a good relationship with someone or being in a good relationship with yourself ... is the most important thing.

In your case ... you came in here for help, sharing all the s*** you are living in and when we tell you to GET THE HECK OUTTA THERE! ... your reply is that we are taking it too far and you get to have a ring on your finger. (shrugs) SO WHAT?

This is the montra of every stupid (that's right I said it!) woman that stays in an abusive, dysfunctional relationship ... and then wants everyone to 'understand'. Hee hee! Hey! We are NEVER gonna be able to 'understand' THAT level of stupid.

You said it yourself - that you are 27 and are always taking crap from men. I am 58 and I haven't taken a 10th of the crap you have described so far in this thread from the men I have dated ... all PUT TOGETHER!!

That's because even when I was young and dumb about men ... I at least had enough self-esteem to recogize that SOMETHING was not right with the guy ... and I LEFT early on. That instead of hanging around begging for crumbs and getting knocked up. DUH! You have to have enough going on on the inside to see the red flags with these losers early on.

Or ... maybe you are used to being treated like s*** so this all seems normal/okay to you but I predict you will find no peace and (worse) ... you will mess up that innocent child in the head too.

I think YOU are the one that has it all wrong.

Edited by Printer_Ink - Apr 18 2014 at 5:45am
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote BitterSweet85 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 25 2014 at 1:13pm
Im just sad OP expected this thread to turn out differently..
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote BitterSweet85 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 25 2014 at 1:33pm
@ Printer_Ink you do make some valid points...but you come across as a self righteous, know-it-all, ALL the damn time..here and in TTT. You need to work on that.
DUH!
You knew that already tho lol
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Midna Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 26 2014 at 4:24am
Originally posted by BitterSweet85 BitterSweet85 wrote:

Im just sad OP expected this thread to turn out differently..

They usually go like this. Unhappy
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Twisted_Angel Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 26 2014 at 8:16am
Originally posted by BitterSweet85 BitterSweet85 wrote:

@ Printer_Ink you do make some valid points...but you come across as a self righteous, know-it-all, ALL the damn time..here and in TTT. You need to work on that.
DUH!
You knew that already tho lol



I agree with that
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