BB I had tears in my eyes just reading the title on the front page.
We just can not imagine how you must feel. I know that I'd be torn apart, you're being do strong, my heart goes out to you
I like Jones' suggestion about a widows support group.
It sounds extremely trite but have you tried a pet? I suggest it because the cats helped my grandmother and she hated all animals but the fact that they care unconditionally and console her with no explanation needed, somehow helps her. Although I have two cats, I think the right dog would be better
I feel like I have so much to say but just can't find the words. I'm so sorry about your husband and I pray peace and eventual happiness to be upon you Ms. BB.