Black Hair Media Forum : This can't be my life :( http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/ Wed, 22 May 2013 13:37:12 +0000 Sun, 30 Dec 2012 12:31:55 +0000 http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss Web Wiz Forums 10.15 360 Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/RSS_post_feed.asp?TID=348405 <![CDATA[Black Hair Media Forum]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com//forum_images/BHM_Logo_v5_Forum.jpg http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/ <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : I think that you should consider...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post10036824.html#10036824 Author: babycakebabe
Subject: 348405
Posted: Dec 30 2012 at 12:31pm

I think that you should consider going to an out of state college and living on campus. Your mom is going through an early mid life crisis b/c she is recapturing the youth that she didnt have in her 20s and you will end up taking on the 'mother' role and the arguing will not cease. Your life is an adult is just beginning and you should not have to focus on her decisions when you should be focused on setting your own path. Good luck <3
]]> Sun, 30 Dec 2012 12:31:55 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post10036824.html#10036824 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : Gurl! Moms do that sometimes....]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9924644.html#9924644 Author: rissa86
Subject: 348405
Posted: Nov 14 2012 at 12:51pm

Gurl! Moms do that sometimes.  lol. I know mine has. but at the end of the day you have to live your life for you. If your mom wanna date the scrubs, let her. If you believe in God pray for her and do you. Make the right choices for you. Date the guy  you would be proud to bring home, who no one can say anything about cuz he has it together
 
Good Luck!
]]> Wed, 14 Nov 2012 12:51:47 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9924644.html#9924644 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : ifeyini wrote:Pray for your...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9841450.html#9841450 Author: babyk94
Subject: 348405
Posted: Oct 07 2012 at 4:40pm

Originally posted by ifeyini ifeyini wrote:



Pray for your mom. Obviously she is attracting men that she feels like she can save but she cant. She may need to reevaluate why she is dating men that have nothing to offer her.
You are exactly right we have been talking about this daily and things are getting better.]]> Sun, 07 Oct 2012 16:40:44 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9841450.html#9841450 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : Pray for your mom. Obviously...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9838014.html#9838014 Author: ifeyini
Subject: 348405
Posted: Oct 05 2012 at 8:10pm

Pray for your mom. Obviously she is attracting men that she feels like she can save but she cant. She may need to reevaluate why she is dating men that have nothing to offer her.]]> Fri, 05 Oct 2012 20:10:08 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9838014.html#9838014 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : babyk94 wrote: J_Shawty...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9804005.html#9804005 Author: J_Shawty
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 23 2012 at 4:04am

Originally posted by babyk94 babyk94 wrote:

Originally posted by J_Shawty J_Shawty wrote:

Honestly OP I would find a respectful way (and I honestly mean respectful lol) to tell ya moms to mind hers. Or just let her know that if she doesn't want you with a deadbeat why is she picking up deadbeats and not being a good role model for you. Some times you gotta open folks eyes. I don't agree with your mother doing her...cause she is still ya moms and gotta do the right thing not just for you but for her. I know ya moms doesnt want a man who aint $hit.
That is exactly what I did and she ended it! She told me that she was proud of me for telling her the truth and that everything I explained to her really hit home. SmileSmileSmile

Good!! I'm glad everything worked out!!!
]]> Sun, 23 Sep 2012 04:04:24 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9804005.html#9804005 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : J_Shawty wrote:Honestly OP...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9803313.html#9803313 Author: babyk94
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 22 2012 at 8:12pm

Originally posted by J_Shawty J_Shawty wrote:

Honestly OP I would find a respectful way (and I honestly mean respectful lol) to tell ya moms to mind hers. Or just let her know that if she doesn't want you with a deadbeat why is she picking up deadbeats and not being a good role model for you. Some times you gotta open folks eyes. I don't agree with your mother doing her...cause she is still ya moms and gotta do the right thing not just for you but for her. I know ya moms doesnt want a man who aint $hit.
That is exactly what I did and she ended it! She told me that she was proud of me for telling her the truth and that everything I explained to her really hit home. SmileSmileSmile]]> Sat, 22 Sep 2012 20:12:08 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9803313.html#9803313 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : Honestly OP I would find a respectful...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9803309.html#9803309 Author: J_Shawty
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 22 2012 at 8:05pm

Honestly OP I would find a respectful way (and I honestly mean respectful lol) to tell ya moms to mind hers. Or just let her know that if she doesn't want you with a deadbeat why is she picking up deadbeats and not being a good role model for you. Some times you gotta open folks eyes. I don't agree with your mother doing her...cause she is still ya moms and gotta do the right thing not just for you but for her. I know ya moms doesnt want a man who aint $hit.]]> Sat, 22 Sep 2012 20:05:32 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9803309.html#9803309 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : Let mama do her! ]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9797195.html#9797195 Author: BoutThatLife
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 19 2012 at 8:54pm

Let mama do her!]]> Wed, 19 Sep 2012 20:54:00 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9797195.html#9797195 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : khivey wrote:Well you know...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9792385.html#9792385 Author: babyk94
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 17 2012 at 8:17pm

Originally posted by khivey khivey wrote:

Well you know what you don't want. Stay focused on school and work for now. Try to stay busy with friends and stuff so it isn't all in your face. Let her be your motivation to do better. 

Thank you that is exactly what I am going to do!]]> Mon, 17 Sep 2012 20:17:58 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9792385.html#9792385 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : Junior Jr wrote:you go to mc,...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9792383.html#9792383 Author: babyk94
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 17 2012 at 8:17pm

Originally posted by Junior Jr Junior Jr wrote:

you go to mc, babyk?

jr.
I'll be going in the spring.]]> Mon, 17 Sep 2012 20:17:13 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9792383.html#9792383 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : Well you know what you don&#039;t...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9792374.html#9792374 Author: khivey
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 17 2012 at 8:11pm

Well you know what you don't want. Stay focused on school and work for now. Try to stay busy with friends and stuff so it isn't all in your face. Let her be your motivation to do better. ]]> Mon, 17 Sep 2012 20:11:57 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9792374.html#9792374 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : you go to mc, babyk?jr. ]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9792344.html#9792344 Author: Junior Jr
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 17 2012 at 7:56pm

you go to mc, babyk?

jr.
]]> Mon, 17 Sep 2012 19:56:00 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9792344.html#9792344 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : Midna wrote:It really sucks...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9792073.html#9792073 Author: babyk94
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 17 2012 at 5:23pm

Originally posted by Midna Midna wrote:

It really sucks when parents date deadbeats.

But coming from the daughter of a woman who is dating an asshole deadbeat with a controller complex, the best advice I can offer is to let your mom live her life. She is gonna date who she wants. Let that man show her himself what a piece of crap he is. If she's okay with it, he's not going anywhere. If she's not, bye bye to him.

My entire family dislike my mom's boyfriend and for good reason. But we all have our lives to live and we're tired of trying to show her the light. You can't help someone who doesn't want help. Ouch


Thank you, I just don't understand how she could be so stupid. I'm just trying to stay away from her as much as possible. She will never be the mom I always wanted her to be. I have to just accept her or not.]]> Mon, 17 Sep 2012 17:23:25 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9792073.html#9792073 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : It really sucks when parents date...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790785.html#9790785 Author: Midna
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 17 2012 at 3:01am

It really sucks when parents date deadbeats.

But coming from the daughter of a woman who is dating an asshole deadbeat with a controller complex, the best advice I can offer is to let your mom live her life. She is gonna date who she wants. Let that man show her himself what a piece of crap he is. If she's okay with it, he's not going anywhere. If she's not, bye bye to him.

My entire family dislike my mom's boyfriend and for good reason. But we all have our lives to live and we're tired of trying to show her the light. You can't help someone who doesn't want help. Ouch
]]> Mon, 17 Sep 2012 03:01:17 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790785.html#9790785 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : Positive K wrote:Wow this is...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790625.html#9790625 Author: babyk94
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 16 2012 at 11:13pm

Originally posted by Positive K Positive K wrote:

Wow this is interesting!! But I have a off-topic question OP. Where in Maryland do you live?? I live in Rockville.

I understand you're upset but you must let your mom live her life. And if she is making mistakes that you can clearly point out, do the smart thing and do the OPPOSITE of what she is doing. Yeah she might be hypocritical and not a good role model but use those flaws of your mother to not make the same mistakes. Don't copy and end up messed up too.


Omg I am always in Rockville! I live in Wheaton ]]> Sun, 16 Sep 2012 23:13:45 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790625.html#9790625 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : Thank you everyone! We we&#039;re...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790619.html#9790619 Author: babyk94
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 16 2012 at 11:09pm

Thank you everyone! We we're fighting all day yesterday and I didn't know what to do. She is just so hypocritical I can't even talk to her anymore. ]]> Sun, 16 Sep 2012 23:09:31 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790619.html#9790619 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : Nubialady wrote:  ^^ You sure...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790610.html#9790610 Author: healthyhair42012
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 16 2012 at 11:04pm

Originally posted by Nubialady Nubialady wrote:

Ermm  ^^ You sure that's not your mom logged in


I am not her mom. I just understand what it is like to be a young mom. I had my first child at 20. It's not easy giving up your youth but the reward is soo great. She seems like a smart young lady so I know her mother is proud! ]]> Sun, 16 Sep 2012 23:04:36 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790610.html#9790610 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : Don&#039;t go and date a 25 y/o...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790607.html#9790607 Author: ummmok
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 16 2012 at 11:01pm

Don't go and date a 25 y/o too lol. Too old for you.

I think your mom has room for improvement. There isn't much you can say to change her mind though, I'd just let her do whatever she's going to do regardless. Just don't follow in her footsteps.

Edited by ummmok - Sep 16 2012 at 11:02pm]]> Sun, 16 Sep 2012 23:01:55 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790607.html#9790607 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : Right now I am working and will...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790576.html#9790576 Author: babyk94
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 16 2012 at 10:45pm

Right now I am working and will be going to community college in the spring, I am going to have to deal with this for a while. I really thought she changed and then she goes and dates a 25 year old. ]]> Sun, 16 Sep 2012 22:45:49 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790576.html#9790576 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : i don&#039;t blame you for...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790563.html#9790563 Author: Spokenword
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 16 2012 at 10:36pm

i don't blame you for feeling that way. i would feel the same way with my mom.  she is probably judgemental because she does not want you to make the same mistakes she has made/is making.  her behavior is all she knows and though she is not willing to change it, she does not want to see that for you.
 
you can state your peace, but unfortunately, you may also just have to accept your mom for who she is.  let the things she does show you what you don't want in your relationships or for yourself.
 
will you be moving on to college or out of the house anywhere after school? perhaps a change of enviornment would do you both good.
]]> Sun, 16 Sep 2012 22:36:17 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790563.html#9790563 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : ^^ You sure that&#039;s not your...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790559.html#9790559 Author: Nubialady
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 16 2012 at 10:35pm

Ermm  ^^ You sure that's not your mom logged in]]> Sun, 16 Sep 2012 22:35:15 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790559.html#9790559 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : healthyhair42012 wrote:Your...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790553.html#9790553 Author: babyk94
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 16 2012 at 10:31pm

Originally posted by healthyhair42012 healthyhair42012 wrote:

Your mom had you pretty young. I think you should cut her a little slack. She probably didn't have a chance to be young and carefree because she wanted to be the best mom she could to you. I agree with you on most points but you have to think she had to grow up as soon as she had you. Now that you are almost grown up she probably feels like it is her time to do her. She may feel more of a connection to younger men because they remind her of what she gave up.

Not trying to make it seem like you are at fault but I hope you can understand what I am saying
No I understand thank you, honestly I never thought about it that way. I'm just so upset I can't think straight.

Edited by babyk94 - Sep 16 2012 at 10:32pm]]> Sun, 16 Sep 2012 22:31:15 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790553.html#9790553 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : Your mom had you pretty young....]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790540.html#9790540 Author: healthyhair42012
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 16 2012 at 10:26pm

Your mom had you pretty young. I think you should cut her a little slack. She probably didn't have a chance to be young and carefree because she wanted to be the best mom she could to you. I agree with you on most points but you have to think she had to grow up as soon as she had you. Now that you are almost grown up she probably feels like it is her time to do her. She may feel more of a connection to younger men because they remind her of what she gave up.

Not trying to make it seem like you are at fault but I hope you can understand what I am saying

Edited by healthyhair42012 - Sep 16 2012 at 10:28pm]]> Sun, 16 Sep 2012 22:26:32 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790540.html#9790540 <![CDATA[This can't be my life :( : Today I just found out my mom...]]> http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790523.html#9790523 Author: babyk94
Subject: 348405
Posted: Sep 16 2012 at 10:19pm

Today I just found out my mom who is 34 almost 35 in November is dating her co-worker who is 25. He still lives with his mother,, he has no car, and has nothing going for him. I wouldn't be so mad if my mom didn't make my life hell when I was dating my ex (he was also not a good guy). Her last relationship was with an older guy who also had nothing going for him as well, I just feel like she is so hypocritical/judgmental when she is in no position to judge anyone. I feel like she hasn't been a good role model and it's really affecting my life. Am I wrong for being upset with her? We have been arguing about it all day. If it helps I am 17 btw]]> Sun, 16 Sep 2012 22:19:44 +0000 http://Forum.BlackHairMedia.com/this-cant-be-my-life_topic348405_post9790523.html#9790523